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Gustave Caillebotte‘s “Paris Street, Rainy Day” (1877)

Current Location: The Art Institute of Chicago, Chicago IL

FACT OF THE DAY: Coulda, Shoulda, Woulda…sorry vigilante boy…it’s all your fault.

Tags: Calliebotte, Paris Street, Rainy Day, Batman, Bruce Wayne, Thomas Wayne, Martha Wayne, DC Comics, Batmobile, Suicide Slum, Harvey Dent, Commissioner Gorden, Gotham City, Superman was just Superboy back then, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Jean-Paul Lauren‘s “L’Excommunication de Robert le Pieux” (1875)

Current Location: Musée d’Orsay, Paris France

FACT OF THE DAY: Besides excommunication, quitting smoking was the hardest thing Robert le Pieux ever went through.

Tags: Jean-Paul Laurens, Excommunication, cigarettes, smoking, no smoking, rebound, off the wagon, is that a hookah pipe, these people are toasted right now, that was some great dope, let’s just chill today, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Edmund Blair Leighton‘s “Accolade” (1901)

Current Location: Private Collection

FACT OF THE DAY: …then she got on her knees

Tags: Edmund Blair Leighton, The Accolade, Making boys into knights, middle ages, you’re getting a raise, a nicer title, but your pay is going to stay the same, Hottie with a sword, young woman and young man with a luke skywalker haircut, I used to own pajamas with footies too, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Caravaggio‘s “The Incredulity of Saint Thomas” (1602)

Current Location: Sanssouci of Potsdam, Germany

FACT OF THE DAY: Complete the procedures and collect your fee, but don’t touch the sides or OPERATION!

Tags: Caravaggio, Baroque, Jesus, Christ, Saint Thomas, Very Incredulous, Poke my wound, squishy, squishy noises, don’t touch the sides or you won’t collect your pay, OPERATION! By Milton Bradley, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Edgar Degas‘ “At the Stock Exchange” (1879)

Current Location: Musee d’Orsay, Paris France

FACT OF THE DAY: If someone you know doesn’t hate the creepy thumb – that person is a pedophile.

Tags: Edgar Degas, At the Stock Exchange, Financial Conspircacy, The Creepy Thumb, Dudes in top hats creep me out, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Anna Lea Merrit‘s “Love Locked Out” (1889)

Current Location: Tate Modern, UK

FACT OF THE DAY: A mail slot that opens up for anyone is a mail slut.

Tags: The Tate collection, practical joke, nature boy, nakey, mail slot fetish, here I come, the glory hole, young naked boy, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Andy Thomas‘ “The End of Soapy Smith” (2009)

Current Location: Private Collection

FACT OF THE DAY: The origin story of Laser Tag fraught with violence and murder.

Tags: Andy Thomas, Soapy Smith, Gangster, Old West, Gun Fight, Alaska, Swindler, Wounded, LOST finale, Jack Shephard, Christian Shephard, Hurley, The Island, Flash Sidewise, What does it all mean? Jimmy Kimel, I don’t get it, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Max Ernst‘s “The Fireside Angel” (1937)

Current Location: The Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York

FACT OF THE DAY: I am huge in Japan. Huuuuuuge.

Tags: Max Ernst, The Fireside Angel, Giant Monster, Max had to escape the nazi’s, Japanese people had to escape godzilla, no one gets free tickets anywhere unless they give up their seat to someone at the gate, points are awesome, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Chuck Close‘s “Lucas” (1987)

Current Location: Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York, New York

FACT OF THE DAY: Mind Explosions most frequently occur on Tuesdays.

Tags: Chuck Close, Lucas, Metropolitan Museum of Art, New York, New York, Portrait, Get Ready for a Mind Explosion, Mind Freak, Reference to Human Giant, Paul Scheer, Aziz Ansari, Rob Huebel, It was on MTV, Also, it’s Tuesday, the day when most mind explosions occur, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Francisco de Goya‘s “Dutchess de Alba” (1779)

Current Location: Hispanic Society of America, New York

FACT OF THE DAY: Spain Wins!

Tags: Francisco de Goya, Viva Espana, Soccer, World Cup, Dutchess de Alba, Mourning portrait, black dress, gigantic boobs, soccer ball breasts, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Jean-Honoré Fragonard‘s “The Bolt” (1778)

Current Location: Musée du Louvre, Paris

FACT OF THE DAY: This is exactly why girls tell guys not to play games with them.

Tags: Jean Honore Fragonard, The Bolt, Louve, Paris, Twister, Feel like making love, let’s get it on, time for some Barry White music, the hibbity dibbity, look at how she’s dressed, she’s asking for it, tippy toes, young lovers, pendant, The Adoration of the Shepherds, The apple on the table is temptation, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Paolo Veronese‘s “Susanna in the Bath” (1585)

Current Location: Musée du Louvre, Paris, France

FACT OF THE DAY: My doctor told me it was a good idea for me to look and inspect ya boooobs.

Tags: Paolo Veronese, Paris, Musée du Louvre, Susanna in the Bath, Susanna and the Elders, Book of Daniel, So she’s taking a bath, and then these guys are start hitting on her and saying “If you don’t do us, we’ll tell everyone you were cheating on your very wealthy, prominant husband.” So she rejects them and gets taken to court and this guy Daniel shows up and delivers one of the first cross-examinations in history. He Perry Mason’s the F out of the two elders and they admit to lying…next episode. It’s a new testament bible story, no angels this time around. Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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James Rosenquist‘s “Gift Wrapped Dolls #37 and #16″ (1992, 1997)

Current Location: Feigen Contemporary, New York

FACT OF THE DAY: Dolls can be simultaneously adorable and creepy – like me.

Tags: Rosenquist painted Gift Wrapped Dolls in creepy, creepy ways. Th enew Molly Soulmate Doll will actually eat your child’s soul and spit it back out if you pull her string. Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Johann Zoffany‘s “John XIV Lord Willoughby de Broke and his Family in the Breakfast Room at Compton Verney” (1766)

Current Location: J.Paul Getty Museum, Los Angeles, CA

FACT OF THE DAY: If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again.

Tags:  J.Paul Getty Museum, Los Angeles, CA, The winner of the longest title award, How to have a male child? Keep trying, Girls are made of sugar and spice and everything nice, but they can be complete bitches as teenagers, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Title of Statue: “Liberty Enlightening the World”
Sculptor: Frederic Auguste Bartholdi
Structural Engineer: Gustave Eiffel
Champion Fundraiser: Joseph Pulitzer

Date Construction of the Statue began in France: 1875
Statue completed in Paris: June 1884
Statue presented to America by the people of France: July 4, 1884

Current Location: Manhattan, NY

FACT OF THE DAY: As a giant green American, Lady Liberty protects Manhattan from Godzilla.

Tags: Sculpted by Frederic Auguste Bartholdi with construction plans by Gustave Eiffel, fundraising by Joseph Pulitzer, and a sweet poem by Emma Lazarous, Liberty Enlightening the World (aka The Statue of Liberty) was a beacon of hope to generations of immigrant Americans. As a giant green american, she also serves to protect Manhattan from Godzilla. Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Percy Moran‘s “The Birth of Old Glory” (1917)

Current Location: The Library of Congress, Washington D.C.

FACT OF THE DAY: Even if it becomes a state, Puerto Rico will never be represented on the flag.

Tags: Percy Moran, The Birth of Old Glory depicts Betsy Ross and 2 young girls, who would become daughters of the revolution, presenting George Washington with the first American Flag. It consisted of stars, stripes and the devil-horns, to symbolize the 13 bad-ass original colonies and their rockin’ stand against tyranny. Debuting on July 4th, the American Independence Day, this flag was exactly what George and the other founding fathers were mother f*ckin talking about. Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Sir William Nicholson’s “Sir James Matthew Barrie” (1904)

Current Location: National Galleries of Scotland, Scotland

FACT OF THE DAY: I’ll never grow up, never grow up, never grow up…not me.

Sir James Matthew Barrie wrote the novel Peter Pan in 1911, Wendy, Tiger Lilly, Captain and the Lost Boys, CREATIVITY MUST ALWAYS DEFEAT THE RULES, Post No Bills is a rule that Banksy, Sheppard Fairey, Mr. Brainwash and Death Bear don’t adhere to, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Jules-Joseph Lefebvre‘s “Truth” (1870)

Current Location: Musee d’Orsay, Paris France

FACT OF THE DAY: This woman was amazing at beer pong…and also…eventually became the Statue of Liberty (true story).

Tags: Jules-Joseph Lefbvre, Musee d’Orsay, Paris, France, Nude woman playing ping pong, Pingponica was the ancient goddess of table sports, she was not the goddess of wearing pants, Cheerleaders were once an integral part of the game, then players started putting their own balls in the cheerleaders, things got ugly, new tricks were learned, stripper ping-pong ball tricks, it got crazy. Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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William Adolphe Bouguereau‘s “Young Girl Defending Herself Against Eros” (1880)

Current Location: J. Paul Getty Center, Los Angeles, CA

FACT OF THE DAY: A boy must defend his mother till the day he dies.

Tags: William Bouguereau, Young Girl, Eros, Cupid, Love, Hate, Stewie Griffin, Lois Griffin, Vile Wench, Defend Yourself, It seems today, that all you see, is violence in movies and sex on TV, but where are those good old fashioned values, on which we used to rely? Lucky there’s a Family Guy, Lucky there’s a man who, positively can do, all the things that make us,, Laugh and Cry, he’s our Family Guy, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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Keith Haring‘s “Characters” (1984)

Current Location: NYC

FACT OF THE DAY: One day soon, we will beat AIDS.

Tags: Keith Haring, Characters, Energy Lines, New York City, Murals, Gay Pride, AIDS victim, HIV, 80′s, Kooties, Art Kicks Ass by Bradley Werner, famous art, masterpieces, artists, painter,

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